It’s the end of another week, Friday evening and I’m sitting here with a glass of whisky and thinking of the chocolate that I used to be able to eat. I’m still off the cheese too, and that has been a lot easier than I anticipated because I just feel so much better. I now look at cheese as my Achilles’ heel, but only if I continue to consume it and after a month, I have had one slice of that 500g block and the rest has gone to feed the birds.

So, nothing has been happening, nothing worth talking about. Life goes on and the days come and go and the routine just kicks in. I hardly need to look at my watch because my body seems to know exactly when it’s time to move to the next phase of the day.

When I got back from the morning run this morning, I went out for a walk and picked up some bits and pieces from the shops on the way through. It was good to hit the fresh air too, because it’s been a bit wet this week and today the rain finally cleared and the temperature is gradually going down. It will soon be time to pull the thermals oot.

As I came back to the house, I noticed two older women walking down the road. By the time I had gone upstairs and dropped off me shopping the door bell rang. It was the Jehovah’s! Oh, what a delight. Feeling refreshed after my walk and listening to a podcast, my brain was firing on all cylinders and I was ready for the battle to commence.

Both were in their 70’s and were seasoned in the art of Jehovah. I laid out my cards fairly quickly and told them that I was a heathen but sometimes I have a gin and tonic with my friend Lucifer. This little detail did not seem to deter them one iota, if anything it seemed to fire them up.

No Bible is carried these days; there is no need when one has an iPhone and can conjure the Bible up in seconds at the beginning of Genesis. I liked the way she meandered the conversation, or should I say monologue to arrive at the point where she told me that God had created heaven and Earth. I asked her, “How do you know God did that? Who wrote this?”

She changed tact once more, I don’t think she liked my response.

“Where do you think we go when we die?” she says.

“Well, we have energy in our bodies and energy cannot be destroyed, only transferred to another state. Maybe we are just absorbed into the ether or maybe we shift sideways into another one of the parallel universes that are supposed to exist, you know as it’s stated in String Theory”

This banter went on for a wee while. I could see that she was getting a bit frustrated because she was making no headway, so I gave her a crumb and I told her that I do like to travel and when I do I spend a lot of time in Churches, Cathedrals and any religious building really because I find them absolutely fascinating. I also said that I find religion interesting but that is as far as it goes. I also pointed out the that basing a religion on a virgin birth was very bold indeed and if it had been set in Glasgow and not Bethlehem the idea would never have flown.

The quieter of the two ladies said to me that she had once gone to Thailand, I had mentioned that I thought the Buddhists have worked out the best way to take money from the poor and still make them feel good. I asked her, “What did you think of the temples in Thailand” She replied, “oh I did not go in, I mean why would I want to go in when I have my own faith and path to follow. It just would not be right”

Isn’t that sad? She travels to Thailand and does even look at one of the most important parts of Thai culture, it is irrelevant that it is a religious structure……. many of these temples are just amazing and if you have every been to the White Temple in Chiang Rai then you will know what I am talking about. Their religion brainwashes them, as they all do and controls them to the point where maybe they feel just looking at something will get them into trouble with their god.

We spoke about Faith. When they accepted the Holy Spirit and had faith then their worlds changed and they felt content. I told them that I have faith in myself and that many people who do put their faith into their god don’t worry about things because it gives them the freedom to get on with life as they think that their God is the one making the decisions for them. Oh and the only spirit that I am interested in is Whisky.

 I just remembered, I told them that my house is actually built on consecrated ground because there used to be a church on this site up to the mid 1970’s and I felt it quite ironic. They said that it makes no difference it’s just a building, nothing special.

This ping pong match was going on and on, however it wasn’t too long where I could see them getting ready to leave and move onto another lost soul, however I kept the conversation going and eventually they thanked me for being so nice and polite and scurried away down the driveway. I don’t think I will have any further visits from her and her crew anytime soon. I’ll be black listed hopefully. They did look rather frazzled and not as energetic has they had been.