On a Wednesday I go to an Italian company called MMG and I give English lessons to some of the employees there.Wendy is one of the girls I teach and she said to me a couple of weeks ago that her and her husband could give me a lift home which is great because my new digs are a fair way away from this company. Yesterday was my 3rd ride home and as usual it can be an exciting ride due to the very fact that you are in China. For some strange reason, which I have no idea why, we sit in the back seat. Often when you see a family here or even if the car has just a husband and wife then the wife will sit in the back and not beside the driver. So Wendy and I are chatting in the back of the car and her husband seems to be in the mood to change lanes all the time and getting no where fast. On the freeway he does a lot of heavy breaking because he is sitting on the arse of the guy in front. The driving tonight is an example of how the vast majority drive here. He doesn’t look ahead and read the road and so he’s on and off the gas. Rather than staying in the one lane his in impatience is getting the better of him and he gets caught at every wrong decision he makes.

We come to a set of lights which is always busy and when you turn right the 3 lanes narrow into two because we have to go over the bridge. As we do so we see this BMW on the back of a transporter and it has been seriously modified and quite recently by the look of it. He has a chuckle about how you have to be careful when driving in China, Pity he doesn’t take his own advice. After crossing the bridge the road splits into two and gets wider. He is intending to go right at the fork but the bus on the inside has no intention of that happening and so the race begins but the bus has the edge and he is forced to back off as it looks like the bus and car are about to become one. And then for a brief moment car and bus touch and he hits the breaks and then back on the gas as we begin to hunt the bus in front of us.The bus driver is doing a great job of keeping him at bay and of course as a one time crazy bus driver myself I know how easy and enjoyable it can be to play with someone like this. But not to be out done by the bus driver the husband has some crazy moves himself and he screams up the inside of the bus and then pulls in front of him several times until he wears out the bus driver and we both stop in the middle of the road, not off to one side but in the middle of the road. Bus driver and husband exchange words and it’s on………….

The next thing husband is back in the car and we are pulling off to the side of the road. Wendy is very apologetic and says that they will call the police and was I OK to wait or did I have to go somewhere. I said “No problem” I’m just curious to see what happens next. I get out the car to inspect the damage and to be honest I was expecting quite a bit of damage because before I got out the husband and bus driver were going at it hammer and tongs shouting about the damage. I mean it can’t be that bad, after all he still managed to drive the car like Starsky and Hutch.

I get round tho the passenger side and begin to mingle with the passengers from the bus that have all come out to have a look and see what the problem is. I look for the damage and at first I don’t see anything and then I notice the door mirror has a mark on it about 3 cm long and about 1 cm wide. This is the impact point. There is no other damage. I’m a bit bemused by the whole thing, after all it wasn’t all the crazy bus drivers doing, husband was also playing the same stupid game.But to this day I still don’t know what possesses people to take on a vehicle that is twice or three times their size, just let it go. Husband and driver are still screaming at each other, the driver is furious because he thinks that the damage is so small and insignificant and he’s no doubt going for his tea and just wants to get home and this is the last thing he needs is some nutter going on about a scratch. Husband will not budge. I stay in the background and get a few strange looks from the passengers. Another bus arrives and all the passengers board that bus to be whisked away . The police arrive on their ebikes and take particulars. The looks on their faces said it all. “What the fuck are we doing here?” Husband has over reacted and gone too far but he has to play it through to the end, I mean you don’t want to lose face.

After 10 mins the police go, the bus driver screams off and I return to the back seat and continue my chat with Wendy. I’m only 2 kms from my home so we are soon stopping again. Husband stops the car and you can see he is still a little shaken from the whole experience. I hope he learns from this incident and takes a bit more care when driving. I’m a great believer in giving people a little fear now and again to get them to pull their heads in and think of the consequences. I know when I saw some driver being a bit of a bully and forcing his way through the traffic when I drove the buses I would often give them a little fright by gently pulling out into their path and giving them a little scare. But sometimes I was also doing the right thing in the bus and some clown would try and fight with me for space on the road. One day a Volvo driver did this and he lost and I ripped off the front of his car, I couldn’t contain my delight. Although I was very disappointed I never managed to rip off a car door when one was opened in front of me, I always reacted too quick. When I returned to the depot one night and found out that one of my mates had managed to do this on Paisley Road West I was so so jealous.