As we come to the end of this epic flight I am surprised that it’s gone fairly well. The first leg was over 14 hours and when you get on the plane it’s really difficult to even comprehend that length of time and it’s better not to.

I had an aisle seat and was very disappointed because before I changed the date of my flight I had a window seat in a better area, however apart from the idiot sitting at the window who had to get out his seat like clockwork it was better than expected.

Next to me was a Baptist minister from Kenya and he was a big unit but a nice guy. We spoke about many things and only touching on religion briefly, which of course is his day job. And I have a place to stay if and when I go to Kenya.

The clown at the window would go to the loo and not come back for a good ten minutes or more, not sure if he was in there for business or pleasure. Even my Baptist friend was becoming aggravated at the number of times. Mind you he did look like someone you would happily just punch in the face.

So 14 hours to Dubai and then just under 8 to Glasgow with a 3 hour transit. On the second flight I once again have an aisle seat but the two ladies have not moved from their seats once, I did. There are too many kids on this flight and the parents don’t seem to realise they are on a plane with a few hundred people, I hate kids. Especially the ones that just moan and moan for the attention knowing their parents boundaries. I still feel that a separate cargo hold has merit for these creatures.

All of this justifies spending a huge amount of money on my Sony noise cancelling headphones which have been invaluable in making this journey bearable. I am surprised at just how effective they are at cutting out the background noise, including those Fuckin’ kids tantrums. I did manage to get a bit of a snooze on the first leg, although I think there was a bit of dribble. My new neck brace worked well but still not the best design. The seats are hard and getting comfortable is not easy. I didn’t drink much, only two glasses of wine so I feel it was just sheer exhaustion that helped me get some zzz.

I am very dehydrated but that is no surprise because I often do this so I don’t have to keep going to the loo on the plane, mind you the A380 has nice loos.

An hour and ten minutes to go and then I’m home.