As you may know or not know, my current accommodation is also an Airbnb house. For the most of the last three months it has been great and I’ve met some interesting guests along the way, however some of them are just a fucking nuisance and death would be too good for them.

This weekend we had one guest that was a closet gay and he was just way too hyper active. Him and Sissi were carrying on like a couple of school girls, screaming and shouting and laughing and after a few hours of this I was tempted to throw him over the balcony. I can’t throw Sissi over because she is the landlord and chief translator.

The other guest that is here for a month or more is a school kid about 16 years old and although he is self sufficient he is also annoying when he appears from his room. He spends most of the time playing games and when he ventures out he is unable to open or close a door without nearly ripping it from the hinges. Doors are slammed and windows shake. He walks through the house like a fucking elephant and does not seem to be aware that other folk are present, but then this is common behaviour here. In the restaurants or on the bus or train they people will watch something on the phone without headphones so that everyone can share. It’s so fucking inconsiderate.

This young kid does not feel very comfortable around me and that is just fine, mind you I have had to give him some advice. For instance when he was washing his dishes after breakfast he will let the water run on full bore and spray it all over the place. So I have shown him how to wash the dishes using just a little water and not an Olympic size swimming pool. There is a dish rack to allow the dishes to dry but this simple piece of apparatus seems to confuse many Chinese and they choose to ignore it completely and instead put the freshly washed dishes on the bench, stacking them in a manner that allows the water to collect in the bottom dish. I have shown him the process but it doesn’t seem to make any sense to him and he continues to empty the swimming pool.

But let’s return to the noise levels…………………….Sissi too will play music loudly on the phone when the TV is on or even if you are sitting quietly reading a book. I honestly don’t know why they are not aware of their surroundings, I mean would you just crank up the music if someone in the house was reading or watching TV?, I don’t think so. This is not just grumpy old man syndrome, no this is someone trying to understand the human condition and trying to figure out the answer or the cure before I’m tempted to take some action myself.

Living in China for the most part is good and I enjoy my life here, but there are some things which I guess are cultural differences which I struggle with at times, maybe I can open up a “Finishing School” and become wealthy teaching not just English but etiquette.