Some days in China are a real struggle as I’ve mentioned numerous times before, but there are other days I don’t give a fuck and embrace the possibility of having a bit of fun. For instance when I get off the metro and the door opens and someone is standing in my way I don’t move anymore, I just stop and stare at them which seems to freak most of them out. A Paddington Bear Stare will usually suffice and they will move out the way, although I’m not sure if the look they give me is one of confusion or fear, either way I get a chuckle from it.

Two days a week I travel on the same route and I use the same doors each time because I want to make a quick exit to the escalator or stairwell that is available and so I’m sure it’s only a matter of time where I will not have to go through this rigmarole each time I travel, but then if I get too bored I’ll just change the door I exit through.

 But what I do enjoy on the metro is watching the look of anticipation and expectation on the faces of the folk waiting to board, hoping there is a seat available, and they rush on and quickly scan the carriage and then as the realisation slowly sinks in that there are no empty seats their wee faces fall flat and they look so sad and then they look again just in case they made a mistake, but alas it’s still the same…..nothing has changed……. 🙂

This is when you will see the older generation morph into a mythical being of sorts, they move at warp speed, When the train stops at the next station they have already managed to scan the carriage and are very aware of the subtle body language which betrays those passengers that are getting ready to alight and even if they are at the other end of the carriage they get there in an instant it’s amazing, it’s akin to some Kung Fu master who is at one with his surroundings and can move in a blink of an eye. If you are the one getting ready to alight then you will be amazed at how quickly the vacant seat is occupied as you and your arse are in mid flight to the upright position and as you soon as you reach your full height I can guarantee that your seat has had no time to get cold due to the new arse that has taken up residence.

I have to change trains on one of my journeys and at the interchange station called Hongzhuang I catch the train to Muli. The train begins from Hongzhuang and so when it arrives at the station the train is empty and yet when people queue for this part of the journey they mostly stand in the correct position, something they rarely do at any other station on the network and so they will stand on either side of the door as they should everywhere else, whereas I do not……………I stand bang in the middle because the carriage will be empty. I’m completely baffled by this behaviour and I can feel a PHD coming on.

If you are a people watcher then you need to come to China and live here for a short time and you will not be disappointed, although I will warn you it will push you to the brink of insanity. You have to remember there are about 1.4 Billion people here and so they will eventually wear you down to a broken individual if you let them, some days I feel like a real basket case…………..