In this day and age of the internet there is no need for customer service representatives, after all everything can be solved by an “avatar” online. We can connect 24/7 with AVA from Airasia or Red from Westpac and may I say both are completely useless.

Let’s start with Airasia, they told me a couple of weeks ago that my flight has been cancelled and so they have moved me to a later flight and if this is not suitable then I can get a refund, just have a chat with “Ava” on the website and all will be hunky dory. Well Ava had a few problems trying to understand for some reason and I was typing in English but I am in China behind the great firewall and I guess my VPN wasn’t doing a very good job. Anyway Ava took all my information eventually and I thought, marvellous. A few days later I have heard nothing and so I log into my account and the flight is still confirmed and not cancelled. I check with Ava and she has closed my enquiry………..I reopen the enquiry and go through the process once more and the same thing happens again. I call Airasia and they say “You need to talk to Ava” I said “I have and she doesn’t want to help me” Customer service guy continues with the same sentence and will not change tack and so we could have spent all day doing this and so I hung up before I became abusive.

I search for ages to try and get a contact for Airasia, an email address, a fax number, anything so that I did not have to go back to Ava but in the end I had no choice. So after saying hello to Ava Avatar I just entered random numbers until finally a link appeared that I could click on which opened up a new window where I could type a nice letter and so I did. So far the correspondence between myself and several Airasia reps would fill a library and I have still not had a resolution. I have never had to work so hard to get my $130 returned to me, I should start to charge Airasia for my time, for the phone calls, for having to go to the bank to get a copy of the initial transaction because after I gave them everything they asked for before they told me there were a few discrepancies with my name. This I feel is the new way businesses do business, they wear you out, they hope that you will give up and just think it’s all too hard, well let me tell you this Airasia………..I am Scottish and there is no way I will let you do me out of that money that is rightfully mine and I want an upgrade on my next flight.

Now Westpac was my next bitch. I got an email to tell me that they are changing from Visa to MasterCard and it will be sent to my PO Box. I called them and asked them to send it to my address in China, no problem was the reply. “Can I have an email address so that I can send you the address in Chinese?” “No sorry sir we cannot enter Chinese into the system, only English can be entered” I knew at this point that I was not going to see my new credit card in a hurry and nearly 5 weeks later I have been proved correct. I called Westpac today and they said “that’s a bit strange sir, you should have received it by now” you would think so. “We can send it again for you” I said “Can you give me an email contact so that I can send you the address both in English and Chinese?” “No not possible” “Can we send it to your PO Box sir?” “NO I’m in China” I hung up.

Now they also told me to talk to “Red” the Westpac avatar which quite frankly is completely useless if you are outside the country, in fact even when you call from overseas it just does not seem to register with the workers that you get on the end of the line. The rules are different if you are outside of Australia, you cannot use the same services and the solutions are also different and I’m amazed, disgusted that a company so large can’t manage to get my credit card from Australia to China. Other companies seem to be able to send coal, baby formula, vitamins but Westpac cannot send credit cards.

I have solved the problem by asking one of my Chinese friends in Australia to receive my card and then forward it to me, this is of course is an easy thing to do and I should have done this at the beginning of this process, but as I say you would think that a bank as big as Westpac can get my replacement card to me, but it does not give me much faith in the process if I lose it, or it gets stolen sometime in the future.

Not everything can be done online, in this global economy and especially when Australia and China are big trading partners I’m wondering why Westpac is unable to enter an address into their system in another language such as Chinese. They have the ability to do this in China and many other countries; surely they would have one person in the company that understands Chinese?

Did I mention that my hotel in Jeju had a super duper hi-tech 21^st century toilet set to auto. This means that you can approach the toilet and do your business and then as if by magic it will automatically flush, bloody marvellous. To the left of the toilet on the wall there is a small control panel with many buttons, the buttons have symbols and so you can get the general idea what is going to happen before you try……….I can’t read Korean and of course there is no English, I just kept pushing the buttons and waited to see what would happen.

In the morning when it’s time for your morning ablutions life becomes so much more enjoyable. The seat is very comfortable and it is not cold in the least, in fact you can set the temperature, but auto is fine. When the time comes to grab for the loo paper, fear not we can save the planet and at the touch of a button noises begin and the next thing you will feel is a warm jet of water being directed at your nether regions, if you are not awake by now you soon will be with a smile on your face. After the rinse and shampoo out comes the hairdryer and at the same time the seat begins to warm up and all that is really missing is your morning cup of coffee and the news paper to finish of a rather pleasant experience. This is definitely on the shopping list when I eventually return home.

The Japanese and the Koreans have had these contraptions for many moons and I guess we are still a bit prudish in the west and think it’s all a bit perverse and if it is I don’t really care. This is the first time that I have used one of these super duper hi-tech loo’s and it comes in the same week as two young girls were beaten to death in India for defecating outside because they don’t have a toilet and here is me sitting on the Rolls Royce of crappers. It is absolutely disgusting that in this day and age that people can’t have the convenience of going to the loo in the comfort of their own home or at the very least in a place which is kept clean and safe. I have been to India and the stench in some places is so ripe that you want to vomit; it’s not only the cattle that shit in the street. At least this is one thing in China that has been a success and where the Chinese government have made it a priority to have good sanitation in many of the old districts where at times there was none.

It’s a strange old world where the priorities of those in power are completely fucked. We would rather send a man to the Moon or to Mars instead of building toilets for the poor, for helping those that cannot help themselves. Australia gave America, of all places, $150 million to help them to get to the moon, when back in Australia there is a drought that has been going for a many years now causing intense pain and pressure for many. America does not need the money, if it stopped being so paranoid about life the universe and everything and stop spending obscene amounts of money on defence then maybe many in their country would be better off too and of course the rest of the world might be a safer place too, oh and maybe we could build some more toilets for those in need………….

Yesterday I went to a town about an hour away called Changshu, I went with a group of Expat’s that had been invited to test drive a tour. I’ve gone on many of these trips since I’ve been here and yesterday’s trip was not too bad. The sun was shining as I strolled up to the meeting point and low and behold there be many a foreigner, a gaggle of them or is it a flock? I knew a few of the faces and nodded morning as I arrived.

I was last on and got the front seat, how marvellous was that? As it turned out we actually had a good bus driver and so the drive was very enjoyable for a change. Our first port of call was at a Qipao factory, what is a a Qipao I here you say?, well have a look below, it’s the name of the dress that the girls are wearing.

After we all had a bit of fun trying long dresses and the like we headed off down the street to an old house of a famous scholar. Once you enter through the front door the design and decor is much the same as many other such places I have visited over the years and so I leave the group and go for a wander and leave them to it.

Lunch is next on the agenda and I’m afraid there are no pictures because we were all really hungry and when the food came out it was just hoovered up. The food we had here was absolutely delicious and I think it was because there were only two fish dishes and the food was all very “foreign friendly” The hot and sour fish soup was great, the pork, the radish, vegetables, in fact everything was great.

We waddled off to our next port of call which was a mini “Great Wall” Changshu boasts a very good and complete section of wall which is surprisingly steep and some of the fatty foreigners did struggle quite a bit when they started to defy gravity and walk up the stairs and when we all reached the top many of them bought ice-cream just to make sure their thighs didn’t shrink too much from the climb.

The last port of call was a private library which had been rebuilt and of course this is where many of these cultural days out take a turn for the worse. Authenticity is important and at times when you arrive at these “olde” places the smell of paint is fresh and everything is shiny and new, but I think we were all getting a bit tired and we were looking forward to the promise of a cup of tea. Not only did we get a cup of tea, but we got moon-cake, fruit and many other calorie filled delicacies to top up the thighs once more and lots of green tea and I got a doggy bag………………I felt fat and ready for a nap.

At one time Changshu had over 100 private libraries. This part of Jiangsu Province is famous for producing many scholars over the years and they have gone on to become officials at the highest positions in government and so I understand why they took us here to introduce the history to us, but sometimes the renovations leave nothing of the original structures.

It was an interesting day out and I got to meet another few foreigners of Suzhou. I will come back to Changshu again and maybe explore this city a little bit more and see what it has to offer.

it was with a heavy heart that I headed to the airport………the sun was shining and the sky was blue and the typhoon had disappeared and it was a perfect day for walking up to the top of the mountain or just to go for a walk along the coast.The air is fresh and clean and there are not many people here. When you are on one of the walks you will not meet many Chinese because they don’t like to walk as a rule, unless of course there is a big shiny shopping centre for them to swan about in.

I was about to return to the heart of the beast which for the last few months I have been struggling with. Many Chinese act in a manner that I find quite distasteful and annoying and when I go on a visa run to another part of the world and I don’t have to deal with them every day, I feel so much better for it. The last week in Jeju has been really enjoyable and I am sure they also have their fair share of dickheads like any other place, but most people are polite and look out for others. When they navigate through their day they are conscious of others, what they are doing, where they are in respect to themselves…………you know just like any other civilised society………….but in China there are many people as I have said before that are utterly selfish, ignorant and are just concerned with themselves and don’t give a fuck about anyone else, their safety and just don’t care about rules.

We boarded the plane in the usual chaotic way, people will stand in the aisle blocking it and don’t get out of the way to let others through. When they do sit down they recline the seat, then when they do sit down some will then think “oh I need to go forward to see my friend and try to push through the tide of people boarding. it must be hell for the flight crew on these flights, sometimes you only have to look at their faces to see the agony of their situation.

When the plane begins to taxi for takeoff they get up to retrieve something from their bag, they are still using their phones, the tray tables are down once more and we are having a picnic, someone wants to use the toilets. After takeoff I took this picture and as you can see there are many that just don’t like to follow the rules when it comes to safety…………..this is the Chinese way.

Most of the Chinese on the plane are part of a tour group and they are led around and spoon fed and told what to do most of the time, don’t think too much………..if only they were educated on these tours to be more considerate to others and told put your phone on to fuckin’ flight mode.

In the picture below you can see the woman holding her daughter after the plane has just landed while we are taxing back to the terminal, maybe one or two minutes have passed. The other woman beside her has already taken off her seat belt and is talking to the people in the row behind her. The guy beside me is on his phone and you know they are not the only ones on the plane. On the last flight that I had a guy stood up to retrieve his bag literally seconds after the wheels hit terra firma……….this is the everyday situation on a Chinese flight

From Pudong airport I took the bus to me bring me back to Suzhou, it’s takes about two hours which is longer than it took me to get from Korea back to China. it drops me about 3 km from home and so I use a local bus to take me the rest of the way. As the bus arrives there is a mad dash by the locals to get on board first. I wait for a couple of people that were before me to jump on and then I take my turn. My case is in my left hand as I move to the door, out the corner of my eye I see someone trying to sneak passed me and so I put my hand on the bus and nearly choke this old woman as her throat catches my forearm…………I look at her and smile………..she is not happy and starts to rant to me………………I’m not sure what she is saying but I’m sure I can guess. In amongst all the chaos of China at least I get a bit of a kick when I stop someone dead in their tracks like this, they were shocked when they were stopped and more so by a foreigner. I guess they don’t expect us to be as rude as them and so at times I do delight in these occasions and this is one thing that I do enjoy about China and I also feel that I am doing them a service by educating them on a little bit of etiquette…………..I know it may sound a bit sick but it keeps me amused and this is something I would never dream of doing or would have to do do in many other parts of the world………………maybe I’ll stay here a little bit longer 🙂

Now I have met quite a few tubes in my time but not one as big as this. This was on my to do list for Jeju. The rain was still lingering about this morning but a quick check of the weather forecast app informed me that after 9am all should be well and it was. There were patches of blue sky, the rain had cleared but the wind was still very strong.

I went to the lava tubes first and then planned to do a bit of walking afterwards, although it was still about 3km from the bus stop which meant I had a short walk to begin with.

I saw this beautiful spider eating a recently caught fly, they look very similar to spiders that I get at my house in Australia.

There is a single strand anchored onto this pot plant keeping the whole web in tension, they are amazing engineers.

The lava tube is about 1km long and you need your brolly when you go inside, especially after all the rain we have had over the past few days. The surface underfoot is amazing, the rock was once a river and you can see the eddies and all kinds of formations and textures along the length of the cave. It’s not well illuminated inside and there are not colourful crystalline structures to see, but you can see the power of nature when she gets very hot and bothered. It’s fascinating and well worth a visit, but bring your brolly just in case and a jacket because it was very cool inside only 15c.

I enjoyed going here and as you leave your subterranean experience the humidity is overwhelming but short lived. My specs steamed up but all I had to do was face the wind for a few seconds and I was defrosted.

They predicted huge winds and about 600 mls of rain but thankfully in the north of Jeju it did not turn out that way. We had squally showers and a few at times felt like you had walked through a waterfall, but I was not concerned because I had waterproofs and they worked a treat……..however not the same can be said for my waterproof hiking boots that I bought in the Mountain Warehouse in Glasgow….. After five mins or so of torrential rain my socks were soggy but the rest of me was dry and so I made for the hotel and changed into my training shoes and this is why I don’t feel so stupid for packing so much for a one week holiday…… I have two pairs of boots and one pair of training shoes and its just as well I brought then all.

I went to an indoor market for a look and had a lazy lunch and then a coffee at BooBu cafe and then it was back to the hotel for a quiet night, not much point wandering about considering the weather and I fancied find nothing anyway…

I’m a coffee snob and I always struggle to find a good coffee wherever I go. At home I have my own Italian blend which I have drunk for many years and it has a rich flavour and strong coffee taste without the bitterness and so for me quality outweighs quantity.

So far on Jeju the coffee has been mediocre and expensive, mind you I did go to the CU convenience store and their coffee was surprisingly good and cheap. But yesterday I stumbled upon this little gem of a cafe with a very interesting decor and atmosphere, old 20’s and 30’s music playing in the background and the coffee was served up on a wooden platter in a lovely wee expresso cup and it was great.

I could have sat here all day just drinking coffee but alas I would have been too hyper and climbing the walls for days, I had finally struck gold….. black coffee gold that is……

A full flavour, not bitter and with a viscosity that allowed you to extract every part of what it had to offer, the taste flowing around from taste bud to taste bud……. Perfect.

One more day here and I’ll make sure I have one more coffee before I go.

I like some Korean food but I’m not a lover of seafood unless it’s fish’n’chips of course and I’ve eaten pork noodles for three days and I really just want some solid food, rice would be fine but it’s not easy to find…..but then again I can’t read Korean and there is very little English which makes it a tad difficult.

I arrived at my hotel around noon and I was a bit peckish and so as I left my hotel I stumbled on a McDonald’s and I stood outside for a minute or two before finally succumbing to a Quarter Pounder with Cheese. It’s been years since I’ve eaten one but I’ll tell you this, it hit the spot 😊

However for some reason I’m having a guilt trip 🤔