Did I mention that my hotel in Jeju had a super duper hi-tech 21st century toilet set to auto. This means that you can approach the toilet and do your business and then as if by magic it will automatically flush, bloody marvellous. To the left of the toilet on the wall there is a small control panel with many buttons, the buttons have symbols and so you can get the general idea what is going to happen before you try……….I can’t read Korean and of course there is no English, I just kept pushing the buttons and waited to see what would happen.
In the morning when it’s time for your morning ablutions life becomes so much more enjoyable. The seat is very comfortable and it is not cold in the least, in fact you can set the temperature, but auto is fine. When the time comes to grab for the loo paper, fear not we can save the planet and at the touch of a button noises begin and the next thing you will feel is a warm jet of water being directed at your nether regions, if you are not awake by now you soon will be with a smile on your face. After the rinse and shampoo out comes the hairdryer and at the same time the seat begins to warm up and all that is really missing is your morning cup of coffee and the news paper to finish of a rather pleasant experience. This is definitely on the shopping list when I eventually return home.
The Japanese and the Koreans have had these contraptions for many moons and I guess we are still a bit prudish in the west and think it’s all a bit perverse and if it is I don’t really care. This is the first time that I have used one of these super duper hi-tech loo’s and it comes in the same week as two young girls were beaten to death in India for defecating outside because they don’t have a toilet and here is me sitting on the Rolls Royce of crappers. It is absolutely disgusting that in this day and age that people can’t have the convenience of going to the loo in the comfort of their own home or at the very least in a place which is kept clean and safe. I have been to India and the stench in some places is so ripe that you want to vomit; it’s not only the cattle that shit in the street. At least this is one thing in China that has been a success and where the Chinese government have made it a priority to have good sanitation in many of the old districts where at times there was none.
It’s a strange old world where the priorities of those in power are completely fucked. We would rather send a man to the Moon or to Mars instead of building toilets for the poor, for helping those that cannot help themselves. Australia gave America, of all places, $150 million to help them to get to the moon, when back in Australia there is a drought that has been going for a many years now causing intense pain and pressure for many. America does not need the money, if it stopped being so paranoid about life the universe and everything and stop spending obscene amounts of money on defence then maybe many in their country would be better off too and of course the rest of the world might be a safer place too, oh and maybe we could build some more toilets for those in need………….